July 25, 2012
hello again.
I’m on my way to Anahiem for the annual RWA conference. which means that I have undergone my annual scan an pat down from the TSA. I swear to god, folks, it’s just me under this dress. There is nothing to search for.
I’m flying Frontier, which means, in addition to the usual per flight drill, I get to learn the name of the animal painted on the tail of the plane.
It’s Andre. He’s an antelope. I do not understand the choice. He might live on the frontier, but he does not fly. Why not an owl. Or an eagle.
Or a pig. Considering how often I blog lately, a flying pig is appropriate.
But enough about the flight,you say. What else has been going on at Casa de dos queso?
As usual, lots of writing. The next book is an October release: Two Wrongs Make a Marriage. It will be accompanied by an Undone (Christmas themed and unnamed). The book after that is finished. The book after the book after is started.
I’m also about a quarter of the way into a sequel to Need To Know. I’m calling it Wetwork.
But seriously, you say. What about the dog?
At least you should. Havoc has been supplying blog material. He’s made a new friend. At least that’s what he thinks has happened. There is a woodchuck living in the backyard. The dog has been trying to play catch with him.
Not tag, mind you. Catch. The DH returned, disgusted after a recent walk because Havoc had rolled his ball into the burrow. Retrieval was impossible. The hole was deeper than arm’s length, and still sloping downwards.
DH explained to the disappointed that this toy was gone forever.
But Havoc is not a quitter. The next day, he returned with a different ball and lost that as well.
A slightly more frustrated DH told the dog he was an idiot. Then he grabbed a shovel and filled up the hole.
The next day, the woodchuck cleared the entrance to his house, and returned one of the balls.
Havoc said “See? I told you so.”. Then he dropped the ball back in the hole. The next day, he dropped the Kong down as well. Probably on the theory that to get something, you have to be prepared to sacrifice.
It took about a week before Woodchuck cleaned house enough to return the Kong. We are still waiting on the balls.
We could live in peace with this animal, if he weren’t also coming right up to the house and stealing vegetables from my pitiful garden. I suspect he also dug up one of my new roses. Not to eat. Just to dig. The rose bush was left at the side of the hole.
I replanted.
He redug. And this time, he hid the bush to keep me from spoiling the hole.
As bugs bunny would say: THIS MEANS WAR.
I have seen the dreaded beast once. With four acres to share, He was I standing about two feet from the front door. Probably waiting for the dog to come out so he could kick Havoc’s ass. The thing was huge. And he has more balls than my dog. Since Havoc is neutered, he has four more balls I than the dog.
So far the live trap has been ineffective.
Did you know that the Red Ryder bee bee gun comes in pink? I am normally a pacifist. But this is about to change.
My parents’ neighbors (in Ohio) had their vegetable garden all the way down at the bottom of their yard – by the woods and the creek. And the woodchucks and deer ate tons of stuff every year. Not that my mom’s garden up by the house was much safer. The new neighbors didn’t realize that spraying the stuff on the plants that make them bitter to deer also make them disgusting to humans, so they have a largely intact but inedible garden.
And I keep saying that if the TSA is going to x-ray me anyway, they could at least forward it to my doctor, who could check me for tumors.