December 16, 2008
I am going to an imaginary Christmas party tonight.
Brenda Novak is having a get together on Second Life, and I will be there. For those of you with real lives, Second Life is a… a…
Hell. Frankly, I don’t know what Second Life is. It is a multi-user environment, where you are not technically playing a game so much as creating a new life, and accompanying it, a new set of problems. In real life, I sometimes get distracted and bump into walls. But trying to navigate a virtual person through a virtual environment, I am discovering a whole new world of clumsy.
The first step in joining Second Life is to create an Avatar.
Actually, the first step is breaking it to the kids.
Me: I am joining Second Life.
#1 Son: You are NOT. (Apparently, this is a bigger broaching of the uncool boundary than the time I sang Pour Some Sugar on Me along with the radio while dropping him off at school).
Me: I am too. I am going to a virtual party.
#1: With your imaginary friends.
#2 Son: Are you going to get drunk and virtually embarrass yourself? (He sounds hopeful.)
Me: No. I need to create an avatar. And a name.
(For a first name, I choose ChristineMerrill. Because strangely, although I write full time, I have no imagination.
Second Life gives you a list of last names to choose from.
Me: How does Oompa sound.
#1:Terrible. Why would anyone choose that?
#2: Other people have better names.
Me: I imagine they do.
But all the names on MY list are terrible. Yootz? Skizm? Algoma? What the hell? Algoma is a city in Wisconsin. I am not going to be Algoma.
Me: I am ChristineMerrill Oompa.
I finish completing the login screen, and my character drops onto imaginary island. Sans clothes. My sons are watching.
This is embarrassing for all of us.
#1: I think you’re kind of naked.
Me: No, here come the clothes.
#2: The computer just crashed trying to load your underwear.
Me: Well, that was fun.
Actually, it is totally unfair. My virtual ass is much smaller than my real one. And apparently, if you want a bigger ass, you have to go to a virtual store and buy one. And it may or may not cost real money, depending on how good you are at shopping.
This is even more unfair. I would think, if I wanted virtual me to get fat, all I should have to do is feed her, and leave her inactive for a while. That always works in real life.
So I settle for the first butt I get, and go looking for new clothes. I meet with limited success. There are many places you can go to get free stuff for your Avatar. If you want to look like a Goth slut or a neon-fairy-vampire.
After a couple hours of fiddling, #2 son looks over my shoulder.
#2: You’re a belly dancer?
Me: I can’t help it. I can’t figure out how to take it off.
#2 And why are you bald?
Me: I lost it. All right? I accidentally deleted my hair.
And this is why it is a bad idea to use your real name on Second Life.
Avatar Fun
Hi Christine, Love your take on creating your avatar around children who can talk. My son is not quite 3 and therefore is limited to words such as Mine and Choo Choo Train!! Now I can be grateful. 🙂
Hope you had fun. We sure did.
Jeannie (Brenda’s Web Gal, and avatar Amelia Scribe.)
Re: Avatar Fun
You certainly captured the moment. LOL Thanks for coming to my party, Christine. From my perspective (Jeannie had to help dress me and my 12-year-old son was better at navigating than I was), you were a pro. I hope you’ll come back next year!
Brenda
Re: Avatar Fun
And thank you both for putting that together. It was a fun format, and something I’d been curious about, but would probably never have tried on my own.
And thank you so much for the virtual gift. I opened a box under the pretend tree and got a selection of cocktails, and a virtual coke machine.
Everyone should have one of those. Really.
Brenda, I thought of bringing you a hostess gift of some kind. You are very lucky to have escaped. Because I was in a virtual pet store…
On days like this, when it is zero degrees and the puppy is teething, it would be really nice to have a dog that could be saved to inventory.
Avatar Fun
Hi Christine, Love your take on creating your avatar around children who can talk. My son is not quite 3 and therefore is limited to words such as Mine and Choo Choo Train!! Now I can be grateful. 🙂
Hope you had fun. We sure did.
Jeannie (Brenda’s Web Gal, and avatar Amelia Scribe.)
Re: Avatar Fun
You certainly captured the moment. LOL Thanks for coming to my party, Christine. From my perspective (Jeannie had to help dress me and my 12-year-old son was better at navigating than I was), you were a pro. I hope you’ll come back next year!
Brenda
Re: Avatar Fun
And thank you both for putting that together. It was a fun format, and something I’d been curious about, but would probably never have tried on my own.
And thank you so much for the virtual gift. I opened a box under the pretend tree and got a selection of cocktails, and a virtual coke machine.
Everyone should have one of those. Really.
Brenda, I thought of bringing you a hostess gift of some kind. You are very lucky to have escaped. Because I was in a virtual pet store…
On days like this, when it is zero degrees and the puppy is teething, it would be really nice to have a dog that could be saved to inventory.